Movies, sports, stingrays, cops and West Virginia (not necessarily in that order).

Wow it has been a while. But I am glad the weekend is over. Friday night I did start watching Season 3 of "Nip/Tuck". Oh, I just learned, like 10 minutes ago literally that my punctuation has been wrong. " " is a TV show and ' ' are movies. Hmm. Anyways the show was quite skanky, and quite good. The Carver turned out who I expected (re: the doc without a dangle).

Saturday, again, mostly watched "Nip/Tuck" because it was raining in NY and no one really got to play any tennis at the US Open. They just aired stupid old matches of Andre Agassi. Blah! And, more sports dissapointment, AVP in Cinncinnati (sp? - who cares, it's just a stupid city in stupid Ohio) was just men on Saturday. Double blah!

Sunday was much better. Tennis blew, two matches were guys, and the one supposedly aired women's match was Serena Williams. Not that she is not impressive, I am just not a fan. So I watched movies. There is something funny on Fatback and Collards blog about rumors of Maria Sharapova and A-Rod dating. I don;t think so! She could kick anyone's ass, she is friggin' 6'2"!

I watched 'The Zodiac'. It was decent. I wonder if the real killer is still alive? Probably not. If he is he's probably all wrinkley and withered. He was probably late 20's early 30's when he started those killings. And not that it is over 35 years later the dude must be getting his senior discount by now. It doens't take much strength to fire a gun, but still.

Then I watched 'The Dark' which was also decent. Not a terribly happy ending though. See, this is why I don't want children. Little girls are mad creepy. They can be used as all sorts of conduits to the dead and evil.

Volleyball was on and it rocked! Misty May and Kerri Walsh lost the first set, but took the last two to win! It was choclate vs. vanilla that day. There was many a pat on the tush to say "good-job, partner". No tackling hugs though, guess those are only for Olympic scale victories. My dad has a little slide show of those pics from the Olympics. Mmm...

Whilst debating whether or not to go to Penny's cheap video store (for a two-day rental $3 for new release, $2 for something older - not a bad deal), I watched 'Love + Suicide' yet again. At the beginning, where they show previews, there was one for some movie called 'Surrender' that looked kind of skanky, so I was not terribly interested. But, this morning I found a review for it on Afterellen.com (my favoritest site in the whole world, especially when they have "The L Word" recaps). Apparently, cute lesbian director extraordinaire Katherine Brooks made/ stars in this sexy tale. Not what I'd expect from her, but I must get a hold of this movie now. In other related news, I just pre-ordered her new movie 'Loving Annabelle'. I am pissed that I am trapped out here as it is playing at the ImageOut film festival in back home in October.

I did go to the video store and brought home many a movie, both good, bad, and hysterically bad.
I watched 'Batman Begins'. Christian Bale is awesome (just not in this movie), Liam Neeson brought Qui-Gon back to life, Cillian Murphy is as good as Peter Sarsgaard (sp?) at being creepy and evil, and Katie Holmes should be shot. Or maybe being Mrs. Tom Cruise is punishment enough. The DVD kept fucking up so that made me hate it all the more.

I watched 'The Cavern' which also blew. It was far too much like 'The Cave', only no cute girls in it and really terrible acting. The whole movie made me claustrophobic. The creature turns out to be a little Russian boy who survived a plane crash and was all deformed so he wore a wully-bully suit and killed cavers so he could eat them.

Another crappy horror movie, 'After Sundown' was truly ridiculous. It was totally a low budget B-movie about a western vampire. I did not know that vampires could create zombies? I think they were mixing genres.

I bet we could make a good scary B-movie out at Kiewig. The house I live in is a bit creepy, especially the basements and the attics (that's right, there are 2 of each). There is also an old hunting cabin that is uber-creepy. We saw it when we went searching around for crap for Herpetology in the spring. We'd have to shoot it in the early spring or late fall, otherwise we'd all end up with poison ivy and lyme disease. With our eclectic departments we'd have quite a cast. The plot could be our research getting back at us, it would be kind of pet cemetary. Half the department would be killed by bats (Whitaker has sooo many students), I'd have a 'Snakes on a Plane' style death (although I'd love to be the lesbian heroine - Samuel L. style!), I-Han and a couple others would be pecked to death by their birds, something would happen to Jon in the icky pond, Storm would get attcked by spiders or angry crickets, Jake's crayfish would re-animate and pinch him to pieces, and I can't think of what everyone else does. It would be awesome! So much better than my film project in college. I'll write about that tomorrow!

Monday, I woke up with no plans at all, and decided to watch more movies! I finally watched 'Just Friends'. Ryan Reynolds is hysterical and Anna Faris is crazy! My favorite part was when she kisses his female friend a little too enthusiastically and says "Mmm...Darla". So. Funny. She says he can see other girls later and say "I like girls. Darla" with such great delivery.

After the funny, I found out from Kailea how The Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin died. Not a fun way to go. I asked Kailea is she'd rather be impaled by a stingray or eaten by a bear (like Timothy Treadwell). She said bear, I said stingray. Then she laughed at me because I am afraid of horses and cows. Ha! Her pretzel jello came out crappy and no one ate her baked ziti last night!

Back to the movies. I watched 'The Exorcist:The Beginning'. That was one creepy church! Little boys are mad creepy too. Why are the native in movies always afraid? They are like animals that they can sense bad things coming. Americanized people have totally lost that ability to know when the hell to get out cuz we are too goddamn busy to fear for our own safety. The modern world is more afraid of abortion, gay marriage, and terrorists that it is with other things. Can I move to Canada?

I watched another B-movie called 'Machined'. Some crazy fat mechanic in the middle of nowhere hits a guy and then decides to fix him with machine parts and turn him into a killer of stranded motorists while he whacks it with vaseline and watches with video cameras.

I went back to the video store, due to going slightly stir crazy, to return movies, and get more.
I watched 'Wrong Turn' which turned out to be a lot like 'The Hills Have Eyes'. Deformed rednecks trapping travelers and eating them. These ones were inbred, not radioactive though. West Virginia is scary! This is why I am not driving to Eileen's wedding reception in North Carolina in a few weeks.

Back to the B-movies. I watched a slighty skanky vampire movie called 'The Sisterhood'. It cracked me up. It made me want to rent 'Eternal' again. Scary 30 year old vampire sorority chicks.

Back to West Virginia AND creepy little girls, I watched 'Silent Hill'. I have been trying to rent this for a while. It was ok, also an odd ending like 'The Dark'. Scary religious fanatics, abandoned towns, and hot cops. I cheered when the cop chick harassing Radha Mitchell had black creepy creature acid goo thrown on her and threw off her helmet and she was sporting messy, spikey-dykey, bottle-blonde hair. Then she threw off her leather jacket (whick matched her leather pants) and was sporting a very form fitting uniform shirt over some possibly fake boobies. I'd let her cuff me! I'd never seen this actress before, she looks a little like Christina Cox from 'Better Than Chocolate' or a blonde version of a dyked-out Rachel Blackman (the chick with the shaved head and the rocket launcher from Matrix: Revolutions). Mmm...

Before bed, I watched 'Just My Luck'. I HATE Lidsay Lohan, but it was fun to watch her get tortured for a bit. Why is she so popular? She is funny in 'Freaky Friday', but she is just plain wretched. She is not cute. She is a little freckley tan-orexic lollipop head!

Today has been super boring and I am trapped at school dipping snake tissue into lots of chemicals until 4pm when we have the departmental seminar. Since I am taking it as a class, I must attend!

I am very tired, I had to wake up at 6:30 to get to school at 8 so I could learn how to teach a half-hour lab on metric conversions. The cat was making tons of noise that confused and angred me. But I just laid there, I am physiologically not allowed to move until my alarm rings. Anyways why is this not a mandatory thing to know in Indiana??? I think Hoosiers measure things in ears or acres of corn.
English units are mad crazy. Today I learned that a rod is 16.5 feet. I think America got rid of that as being normal. We also don't weigh things in stones (1 stone = 14 pounds), but that is less weird, I hear that a lot in British crap.

Anyways, this blog is very quickly turning into a movie review page. I watch the crap, so you don't have to!

Random fact of the day: I did not get my driver's license until I was 22 (legal driving age is 16 in the US, unless you are a crazy farm kid). I took Driver's Ed senior year in high school and did ok or so I thought. Still scary according to my mom - I have been driving for 3 years now and she still puts her foot on the imaginary safety brake (like in driving school cars) when I drive her around. Why is God's name would I wait so long? After high school I went to college and did not need a car where I went, and prefered not to work to pay for one. After college I got a job, and got carted around by family for 3 months until my mom had surgery and I could use her car. The day after her surgery I went for my road test and passed! Less than 2 months later I had enough to buy a new car.